emotions

I just about lost it last night. Even though I have been editing my pictures and looking at all of them multiple times for over a week now, I crumbled within a couple minutes. I was on facebook for quite a while last night because I had nothing to do but stuff to get done on the computer so I let anyone talk to me. I finally put up some of my favorite pictures of the children I had become close to. Friends began commenting on them and I was in a few conversations about being there as well. A friend had told me what a blessing I was to be in her life, and I was thinking back to being over there by running the motions of each step through my mind. The tears began to flow. I decided to go to bed not too long after and couldn't take a hold on my emotions. Everything hit me- the joy, the smiles I still see on their faces, their torn clothing, the smell, their unbathed bodies, their malnourished stomachs, their giggles and singing songs, when a child knew "Jesus loves me" and thats the only way we connected, the injustice of the world, the brokenness that is everywhere, feeling what Christ really feels in what happens to His children, the atmosphere, the driven passion to follow God anywhere, and the hope that Jesus still does what He says and holds all His children in His hands.

I can't imagine living any other way. How sweet the love of Jesus to take our place, die for us, give us the chance to be connected to His Father, and still want to personally be involved in each one of our lives even though we rebel against Him and will always through our sinful nature.